Goal-setting in executive coaching
November 17, 2021
Is it pandemic anxiety or is it OCD? – Elian Beattie
March 17, 2022
The Gift of a Mental Health Check-In
You might see a lot of posts this holiday season with lists of the perfect gift to buy for your loved ones. Somewhere in the spirit of being thoughtful, we can lose sight of the person we’re actually “buying for.” There is one thing you can give to everyone on your list regardless of age, gender, religion, or your relationship to that person; the gift of a mental health check in.
Why Mental Health Check-Ins Matter
With mental health related hospitalizations on the rise both nationally and within our local seacoast community, it is clear that the mental health effects of this pandemic are still ongoing. Because mental health issues may not show up as visibly as a broken arm, we often assume that those affected are not the people we know and interact with on a daily basis. The strongest prevention tool we have for reducing the number of people needing to be hospitalized for mental health is connectedness. By strengthening our connections strong on an individual, familial, and community level, we can make a difference.
Starting the Conversation
When was the last time someone asked you how you are truly doing? Not just a simple greeting, but a question that comes with the intention to listen. It can feel awkward and uncomfortable to think about talking with someone about something so personal, but it does not have to be! Below are some quick tips on how to check in with someone about their mental health.
Mental Health Check Ins: A How To Guide
- Lead with a statement that normalizes talking about mental health. “This year has been difficult for a lot of people’s mental health. How has it been for you?”
- Listen, without interrupting. Smile, nod, show them that you’re paying attention.
- Validate their experience. “It must have been tough to be dealing with that while also going to work/school, being a parent/student/wife/ etc., and living through this pandemic. How you feel makes total sense. Thanks for telling me.”
- Offer to help them navigate the next steps to getting more support, if needed. “Would it be helpful for me to be a listening ear, or would you like me to help you problem solve?”
- Follow up! “I was thinking of you after our conversation last week, and I wonder how you’re feeling now.”
Small Check-Ins Can Make a Big Difference
Remember that you don’t have to be a trained therapist to be the one making the biggest difference to someone’s mental health. A mental health check-in from a friend, a neighbor, a colleague, or even a stranger can save a life.
If you or someone you know is struggling, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is 800-273-8255. The world is a better place with you in it.
FAQ: Mental Health Check-Ins During the Holiday
A mental health check-in is a genuine, intentional conversation where you ask someone how they’re really doing and you’re prepared to listen without rushing, fixing, or judging.
The holidays can amplify stress, loneliness, grief, family tension, and financial pressure. A simple check-in can increase connectedness, which is one of the strongest protective factors for mental health.
Lead with a normalizing statement and a gentle question, like: “This year has been hard for a lot of people. How has it been for you?” Keeping your tone calm and warm matters more than having the perfect words.
If they describe persistent sadness/anxiety, inability to function, substance misuse, panic, self-harm, or feeling unsafe, encourage professional support and offer to help them find options or make a call.
